Conversations With My Father: The Birds and The Bees edition.

Me: I went to dinner with a girlfriend tonight and we were approached at the bar.
Dad: Approached?
Me: Yeah. Some guy was looking for the bathroom and he stopped to chat with us. We thought he was the manager asking on our evening.
Dad: And?
Me: When I found out he was a businessman from out of town, I recommended a good breakfast place.
Dad: And?
Me: Well, he said it sounded good, and that I should join him for breakfast.
Dad: You know that when a man invites you to enjoy a meal, he's only after one thing.
Me: Dessert?
Dad: He's not interested in the food. He wants what comes after the food.
Me: Dessert?
Dad: <silence>
Me: Dad, it's just breakfast. What could possibly be inferred by meeting someone for breakfast.
Dad: A man has needs, and well, if he invites you to a meal, he's really inviting you to participate in something else.
Me: What's that dad? <innocent and lamb like, she asks>
Dad: Sex. Men basically are looking for any way to eventually have sex with women. It's the natural order of things. He just wants to have sex.
Me: He doesn't want breakfast? But that's the most important meal of the day.
Dad: It's what comes after breakfast that I'm concerned with.
Me: That sentence is more loaded than a pile of hash browns at Waffle House.
Dad: What?
Me: Nothing. And I think you're being too general. If a man takes a woman to food, you're telling me it's only because he wants sex?
Dad: I don't make the rules.
Me: Interesting. And duly noted. I'm glad we had this talk.
Dad: That's what I'm here for.
Me: So what are you up to, anyway?
Dad: I'm taking your mother out for dinner.

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